Making decisions

Deciding what to do about a problem pregnancy is an important and difficult task.

You might want to spend some time thinking about your options or discussing them with your partner, parent, or a trusted friend. Some people find that writing things down helps them clarify their thoughts and feelings; you may want to try that as well.

No choice is without obstacles or problems. If, after answering the questions below and others that might arise, you don't have a clear sense of which decision is right for you, you might want to consult a counsellor, clergyman, parent, or doctor to help you work things through.

Thinking about…

continuing your pregnancy?
giving your baby up for adoption?
discontinuing your pregnancy?

Continuing your pregnancy and keeping your child

Here are a few questions to ask yourself that might help you clarify what the right decision might be for you.

1. How would this decision affect me, my family, my partner, the child? What role would my partner play? Could I manage without his help? Would my family help?
2. Where could I go for pre-natal and delivery care? Could I support a child myself? Where would I live during and after my pregnancy? Are there others in my life willing to help me? Have I talked with them about it?
3. How would having a child affect my school and job plans?
4. Am I healthy? Would I have a healthy child?
5. Am I emotionally strong enough to take on the responsibility of parenting?
6. How will I feel about this decision in one year? Five years? What does my religion tell me? What are my own beliefs and values?
7. If I choose this option, will I be doing it for myself or someone else?
8. If I were to choose the ideal situation for becoming a parent, what would it be?
9. What are the pros and cons of this decision?

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Giving up your child for adoption

1. How would this decision affect me, my family, my partner, the child? What role would my family or partner play? Have I talked with them about it? Are there others in my life willing to help?
2. Where would I go for pre-natal and delivery care? Where would I live during my pregnancy? How would a pregnancy affect my school or job plans?
3. How would I feel about this decision in one year? Five years?
4. Do I know my legal rights? The legal rights of adoptive parents and children? Where can I find out?
5. If I choose this option will I be doing it for myself or someone else?

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Discontinuing your pregnancy and having an abortion

1. How would this decision affect me, my family, my partner, the child? What role would my partner play? Could I manage without his help? Would my family help?
2. Where would I go for an abortion? What does my religion say? What are my own beliefs and values?
3. How will I feel in two months? One year? Five years?
4. If I chose this option, would I be doing it for myself or someone else?
5. What are the pros and cons of this decision?

Making difficult decisions about a pregnancy is stressful and emotionally draining. You might want to check out our tips for coping with stress.

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